Epic Rap Battles of Ponyville 1 by T-Brony, literature
Literature
Epic Rap Battles of Ponyville 1
Twilight vs Trixie
Trixie:
Come one, come all; see the Great and Powerful Trixie,
As she beats the sparkle out of Twilight swiftly!
You think you're such a hot-shot with your friends and magic, too,
I'll dress you down in public and turn you into glue!
I'm a goddess on the stage and everything you're not!
So sit your flank down and show Trixie what you've got!
Twilight:
"Great and powerful," huh? How quickly you forget,
the way i put you in your place the last time that we met!
You battling me? That may be apropos,
But to win this rap battle you'll need more than a "show".
Between you and me, it comes down to this:
You're a flas
Epic Rap Battles of Ponyville 2 by T-Brony, literature
Literature
Epic Rap Battles of Ponyville 2
Celestia vs Discord
Discord
Hello, my little ponies! Have you all come to watch?
As i knock this princess down another royal notch!
You battling me? Now isn't that rich!
You may be the princess, but i'm the alpha-male, bi...
Celestia
Now that's quite enough - this is a CHILDREN'S cartoon.
You keep rapping that way and i'll send you to the moon!
All those years imprisoned and you still haven't learnt,
If you fly too close to this sun, you are going to get burnt!
Discord
That's a pretty big threat for a pony to be making!
Especially for a princess who makes others do her fighting.
I'm the KING of Chaos, you're not even a Queen!
B
Epic Rap Battles of Ponyville 3 by T-Brony, literature
Literature
Epic Rap Battles of Ponyville 3
Gilda vs Pinkie Pie
Gilda:
Oh please! A rap battle? Now that's kinda lame!
It's almost as much fun as a clock watching game!
I'm not even gonna bother; it's just not all that fun.
So take a hike, ponies. I'm through. Finished. Done.
Pinkie:
*giggle*
Aw, c'mon, Gilda. You're doin' pretty good!
You're rhyming just like a bad-ass griffin in the hood!
Just turn that frown upside-down and stop acting so aloof,
If you're having trouble rhyming i can always lend a hoof.
Gilda:
Just leave me alone, you annoying lame pink pony!
You think i want your friendship? I'd rather be lonely!
You're a ditz and a dweeb with a grating sense of humo
Epic Rap Battles of Ponyville 4 by T-Brony, literature
Literature
Epic Rap Battles of Ponyville 4
Blueblood vs Big Macintosh
Blueblood
A rap battle? Bah! So distastefully plebeian.
Especially when my opponent's so far below median.
Big Mac, you say? Is that some kind of joke?
When i first heard your name i expected fries and a coke.
I'm of royal blood, you see, and heir to the throne,
You, you're just some work-a-day drone.
Big Mac
...
Blueblood
My word! What's this? Have i already won?
Well it seems to me that this rap battle's done.
I guess we all know which stallion is worst,
So crown me now, ponies - KING Blueblood the first.
Big Mac
...
I'm a pony of few words, but put your sense before hope,
You think you've won th
Epic Rap Battles of Ponyville 6 by T-Brony, literature
Literature
Epic Rap Battles of Ponyville 6
Applejack vs Rainbow Dash
RD:
Tell the truth, Applejack - you don't even need a ruler,
When it comes to "best pony", i'm more than 20% cooler!
A rap battle with you? This will be a snap!
I'll buck you up and kick you out and then i'll take a nap!
AJ:
Whoa nelly! Slow down. Take it easy, Rainbow.
Now sit your flank down and let me deflate that ego.
You may be the pony all the fillies wanna be,
But when it comes to work ethic, pony folk look up to me!
Sorry, RD, ya'll will never be a Wonderbolt,
The only reason folks like ya's 'cause ya act like a colt.
RD:
Oh please, Applejack - you're the kettle, i'm the pot,
The picture of fem
Epic Rap Battles of Ponyville 7 by T-Brony, literature
Literature
Epic Rap Battles of Ponyville 7
Jet Set and Uppercrust vs Rarity
Jet Set
Jet Set and Upper Crust, here - not to put you on the spot,
But when it comes to even rhyming, we're the best in Canterlot.
So get off the stage, little filly, you're cheapening the view,
The last thing that we need is to rap battle you.
We're ponies of class, you're beneath road kill.
We're the upper crust, you're just some pony from Ponyville.
Rarity
Ponies, please; you're living in denial!
I can out rap you both and i shall do it with style!
As for your rhymes, is that the best you can bring?
They're - how shall i say - the worst possible thing!
You want to rap battle with me? The concl
Epic Rap Battles of Ponyville 8 by T-Brony, literature
Literature
Epic Rap Battles of Ponyville 8
Zecora
Well well well, what is it we have here?
A princess with a complex - of that it is quite clear.
You cannot out rap me, i'm a natural born rhymer,
At 1000 plus years, you're just an old timer.
You call yourself a princess, but what is it that you do?
For 1000 years our princess seemed to handle your job, too.
Princess Luna
THOU SPEAKEST OF US LOWLY - AND THY TONE IS KEPT UNCHECKED,
SO WE SHALL MAKE OUR ROYAL DUTY TO TEACHEST THOU RESPECT!
KNOW THY PLACE, LITTLE ZEBRA - THOU SPEAKEST TO A PRINCESS!
IGNORANCE AND CONTEMPT ARE TRAITS THAT SO DISPLEASE US.
THOU KNOWEST WE RULE THE MOON, YET THOU HOLDEST US IN DISDAIN?
PERHAPS,